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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Buckey who wrote (19404)	6/5/2001 12:11:47 PM
From: norm chin	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62569

Okay, Buckey. I was thinking the same. Here's one (hope it was not posted): A young man has always dreamed of owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer. After picking out the perfect bike the dealer warns him that if he leaves his Harley in the rain the chrome has a tendency to rust. He tells the young man an old biker's trick is to keep a jar of Vaseline handy and smear it on the chrome if the bike must be left out in the rain. A few months later the young man meets a woman and falls in love. She asks him to come home and meet her parents over dinner. He readily agrees and the date is set. At the appointed time he picks her up on his Harley and they ride to her parents house. Before they go in she tells him that they have a family tradition that whoever speaks first after dinner must do the dishes. After a delicious dinner everyone sits in silence waiting for the first person to break and get stuck doing the dishes. After a long fifteen minutes the young man decides to speed things up so he reaches over and kisses the woman in front of her family. And no one says a word...! Next he decides to take a more direct approach so he throws her on the table and has sex with her in front of everyone. And still no one says a word...!!! Now he is getting desperate, so he grabs her mother and throws her on the table. They have even wilder sex. But no one says a word...!!!! By now he is getting very worried and is wondering what to do next when he hears thunder in the distance. His first thought is to protect the chrome on his Harley, so he reaches in his pocket and pulls out the Vaseline. And the father says, "Okay dammit, I'll do the dishes.

To: Buckey who wrote (19404)	6/5/2001 4:05:05 PM
From: the dodger	Respond to of 62569

"Imagine if a blond could figure out how to post a message - Then we would be in trouble if they posted an objection to every blond joke" Which reminded me..... So there's this ventriloquist on stage with his dummy -- and he starts telling "blonde jokes". But as he's doing his routine, he keeps getting interrupted by somone in the audience... "Shut up!" someone screams. But he tries to continue. "Quit picking on blonde women!" they yell. So the ventriloquist looks out into the audience, and notices that the heckler is pretty blonde woman standing on a chair. "it's dumb shits like YOU that keep this 'blonde sterotype' going -- hair color has NOTHING to do with a person's intelligence -- can't you SEE how unfair that is?!" "It makes it hard for us to earn a living -- it creates a 'glass ceiling' -- and it's NOT FUNNY!" The ventriloquist -- seeing how upset and adamant this blonde lady is -- starts to apologize to her. But she interupts... "Shut up asshole -- I'm not talking to you! -- I'm talking to that little bastard sitting in your lap!"