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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: The Philosopher who wrote (20358)8/2/2001 4:50:22 PM
From: Lane3  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 82486
 
Huh? Why not?

Chastity is the only certain way to avoid most sexually transmitted diseases.

Chastity is the only certain way to avoid an unwanted pregnancy. (I hope, if they're only going steady, that any pregnancy would be unwanted.)


Chastity certainly prevents STDs and pregnancy. If your priority is for 100% assurance on those two items, it's the only way to go.

OTOH, if we're talking about mature, caring, responsible unmarried couples who have had two or three or five serially monogamous relationships over a lifetime, the risks are quite small. STDs can be diagnosed and mostly cured. As long as you are dealing with a partner who cares enough about you enough to not to put you at risk by concealing an STD, which is part of the qualification for a relationship, I really don't see much risk. Pregnancy, too, can be pretty reliably prevented, although not absolutely. This responsible, caring couple would presumably have some understanding about what they would do if an unexpected pregnancy presented itself. I imagine that if they're taking a marriage for a test run, they'd just speed up the marriage.

As for the benefits of taking a test drive before marriage, I see many. One obvious one, for the woman at least, is that you'd have more assurance of his commitment to you if you no longer had to wonder if he was professing undying love just to get into your pants. You'd have that out of the way and you could better judge his commitment.

I think, though, that the main reason is that sex increases intimacy. You get to know your partner much better through that experience. You learn about character and how the partner handles conflict, for example. You also grow with that experience as a person. I think that couples would want to gather all the information they could about each other before marriage, not after they've made the big step. And to grow into the strongest persons they could be.

I think the benefits outweigh the risks, although I wouldn't want to say that that applies to all couples.

Karen