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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Barney who wrote (20256)	8/22/2001 1:18:43 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62554

More of the amazing Groucho... Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes? I have nothing but respect for you, and not much of that. Room service? Send up a larger room. Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others. He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot. I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it. You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters? You've got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I'll bet he was glad to get rid of it. Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me? Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse. Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know. I must say that I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a book. I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you. I must confess, I was born at a very early age. I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.