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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Barney who wrote (21758)	12/20/2001 10:21:28 AM
From: Barney	Respond to of 62549

A Child's Wisdom... Don't sneeze when you're getting a haircut. Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. If your sister hits you, don't hit her back... They always catch the second person. Most school lunches stick to the wall. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. Never hold a dustbuster and a kitty at the same time. No matter how hard you try, you can NOT baptize cats. Puppies always have bad breath, even after eating a tic tac. Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot. The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma's lap. When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk very long. ** You just can't trust dogs to watch your food.

To: Barney who wrote (21758)	12/20/2001 12:11:12 PM
From: Karen Lawrence	Respond to of 62549

A blonde goes into a store and sees a shiny object. She asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?" The clerk replies, "That is a thermos." She then asks, "What does it do?" The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold." She says, "I'll take it!" The next day, she walks into work with the new thermos. Her blond boss sees her and asks, "What have you got there? "It's a thermos." The boss then says, "What does it do?" She replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The boss says, "Wow, what do you have in it?" "Two cups of coffee and a coke."