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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (23146)	3/31/2002 7:32:48 AM
From: Doug Coughlan	Respond to of 62558

Almost 150 years ago, President Lincoln found it necessary to hire a private investigator, Mr. Alan Pinkerton. He was actually the beginning of the Secret Service (SS) . Since that time federal police authority has grown to a large number of agencies - FBI, CIA, INS, IRS, DEA, BATF, SS, ATF, etc. Now Congress is considering a proposal for another agency: The "Federal Air Transportation Airport Security Service." Can't you see it now, the new service in their black outfits with their initials in large white letters across their backs? "F A T A S S"

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (23146)	4/3/2002 8:18:23 AM
From: JakeStraw	Respond to of 62558

10 Ways to Annoy Cops 1. Say, "Damn, officer, you must have been going fast to keep up with me!" 2. When he approaches you, stare at his gut and say, "Hmmm. I thought cops had to be physically fit." 3. Sway and ask if his bulletproof vest protects him from projectile vomiting. 4. Lie on the ground and ask him to draw your outline in chalk. 5. Throw his nightstick and tell the police dog to fetch it. 6. Ask him if you can use his pepper spray to spice up your pizza. 7. Tell him you wanted to be a cop, but decided to graduate high school instead. 8. When he asks you to walk the line, "Riverdance" instead. 9. Instead of pleading the 5th amendment, plead the 13th or 16th. 10. When he asks for your license, say, "Oh sure, officer, can you hold me beer for a sec?"