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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Barney who wrote (25210)	10/21/2002 10:12:48 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62569

A young Mexican man walked into the welfare office, marched straight up to the counter, and said, "Hi, I'm looking for a job." The man behind the counter replied, "Your timing is amazing. We've just gotten a listing from a very wealthy man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nympho daughter. You'll have to drive around in a big black Mercedes, but the suits, shirts, and ties are provided. Because of the long hours of this job, meals will also be provided and you will also be required to escort the young lady on her overseas holidays. The salary package is $200,000 a year." The young Mexican said, "Ah c'mon man, you're bullsh*****g me!" The man behind the counter said..........."Well, you started it!"

To: Barney who wrote (25210)	10/21/2002 12:27:06 PM
From: sandintoes	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62569

An elderly couple who were childhood sweethearts had married and settled down in their old neighborhood and are celebrating their fiftieth wedding anniversary. They walk down the street to their old school. There they hold hands as they find the old desk they'd shared and where he had carved "I love you, Sally." On their way back home, a bag of money falls out of an armored car practically at their feet. She quickly picks it up, but they don't know what to do with it so they take it home. There, she counts the money, and it's fifty thousand dollars. The husband says, "We've got to give it back." She says, "Finders keepers." And she puts the money back in the bag and hides it up in their attic. The next day, two FBI men are going door-to-door in the neighborhood looking for the money and show up at their home. They say, "Pardon me, but did either of you find any money that fell out of an armored car yesterday?" She says, "No." The husband says, "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic." She says, "Don't believe him, he's getting senile." But the agents sit the man down and begin to question him. One says, "Tell us the story from the beginning." The old man says, "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday..." The FBI guy looks at his partner and says, "Let's get out of here."