To: Jacob Snyder who wrote (72055 ) 2/7/2003 2:42:04 AM From: Karen Lawrence Respond to of 281500 America prepares for war: Calling for morticians to handle our *casualties*: Morticians: Uncle Sam needs you David Stonehouse The Ottawa Citizen Wednesday, February 05, 2003 The United States navy is desperate for morticians. It is taking out want ads online offering $6,000 U.S. bonuses to morticians who are willing to enlist. "We are looking for candidates nationwide!!!!" trumpets the ad at HotJobs.com . It promises not just the sign-up cash, but service in places such as Italy, Spain and Guam. "Even during peacetime," the ad reads, "we are funeral service professionals caring for our brothers and sisters-in-arms throughout the world during a most difficult time, providing aid to their families with honor and dignity." The U.S. navy -- which at its own Web site navy.com tries to entice new recruits with the slogan "Accelerate Your Life" -- says the morticians it requires would be based in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, San Diego and other cities, but would be required for worldwide service. "You would serve as a uniformed member of the United States Navy Hospital Corps, a group deeply ingrained with traditions of honour and commitment not unlike the devotion of those who choose the funeral industry as their career," the advertisement says. "Experience in all facets of the funeral industry is a plus with emphasis placed on technical ability." The U.S. navy denies the search has anything to do with a possible war in Iraq. "If somebody walked in the door today and he had the skills, he had the test scores, and he -- or she -- was physically fit and ready to go, it would be over a year before that person got into fleet," Cmdr. Steven Lowry of Navy Recruiting Command in Millington, Tennessee, said yesterday. "It's purely circumstantial, really." And he said bonuses are not unusual, noting that cash enticements for nuclear propulsion operators are as high as $20,000 U.S. Cmdr. Lowry could not say how many morticians are in the service now but took pains to portray the search as nothing out of the ordinary. "Right now we need some," he said. "Six months from now, that may not be the case. It is the same with machinist-mates or cryptologists or oceanographers."canada.com