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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: 99Dan who wrote (27770)	4/28/2003 12:00:06 AM
From: Tomato	Respond to of 62558

THE SHIITES AND THE SUNIS SHOULD BE FRIENDS to the tune of The Farmers and the Cowmen Should be Friends, from Oklahoma Copyright 2003 Wayne Aaronson Message 18889154 Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, One sect likes to flog their backs, The other likes to rule Iraq, But that’s no reason they cain’t be friends Arabs of Iraq should stick together , Arabs of Iraq should all be pals, Sunis dance with the Shiites’ daughters, Shiites’ dance with the Sunis’ gals ALI: I’d like to say a word for the Sunis, MOHAMMED: Well, say it, infidel! ALI: He makes up less than half the population MAHMUD: That’s right! ALI: They’ve done most of the country’s innovating MOHAMMED: When they’re not killing us or busy mating Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, The Shiites gave us holy men, And Sunis chased them to Iran, But that’s no reason why they can’t be friends MOHAMMED : I’d like to say a word for the Shiites, We’ve got the most and best of ayatollahs, They’ll kick out all the Yanks and rule the country, ALI: You won’t cause we’ll keep out those big assholas! Arabs of Iraq should stick together , Arabs of Iraq should all be pals, Sunis dance with the Shiites’ daughters, Shiite’s dance with the Sunis’ gals ALI: And when a government is finally founded, We’ll all agree the others won’t be slurred, Instead we’ll come together in our hatred, Of Jews and those non-Arab scum the Kurd Arabs of Iraq should stick together , Arabs of Iraq should all be pals, Sunis dance with the Shiites’ daughters, Shiite’s dance with the Sunis’ gals Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, Oh, The Shiites and the Sunis should be friends, They’ve fought themselves for eighty years, Each side thinks that the other’s queer, But that’s no reason why they can’t be friends, Arabs of Iraq should stick together , Arabs of Iraq should all be pals, Sunis dance with the Shiites’ daughters, Shiite’s dance with the Sunis’ gals

To: 99Dan who wrote (27770)	4/28/2003 7:24:55 AM
From: Guardian	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

Subject: RESTROOM OBSERVATIONS "Friends don't let friends take home ugly men" ---Women's restroom, Starboard,Dewey Beach, DE "Beauty is only a light switch away." ---Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina. "I've decided that to raise my grades, I must lower my standards." ---Houghton Library, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts. "If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's all get wasted together and have the time of our lives." ---Armand's Pizza. Washington, DC Remember, it's not, "How high are you?", it's "Hi, how are you?" ---Rest stop off Route 81. West Virginia. "God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust?" ---The Irish Times. Washington, DC "No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her." ---Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill. Chapel Hill, North Carolina. "At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry." ---Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona. "It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere." ---Written in the dust on the back of a bus. Wickenburg, Arizona. "If voting could really change things, it would be illegal." ---Revolution Books. New York, New York. "A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it." ---Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas.