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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (28483)	7/4/2003 9:45:01 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62558

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer." the man began, "I can explain". "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back..." "But officer, I just wanted to say...." "And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back." "Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (28483)	7/4/2003 10:56:12 AM
From: Knighty Tin	Respond to of 62558

Wrong. "She loves me like Iraq." <G>

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (28483)	7/4/2003 11:13:39 AM
From: Karen Lawrence	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

ARKANSAS CITY (EAP) -- A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after leaping through her moving car's sun roof during an incident best described as a "mistaken rapture" by dozens of eye-witnesses. Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty-car pile-up resulted from people trying to avoid hitting the woman who was apparently convinced that the rapture was occurring when she saw twelve people floating up into the air, and then passed a man on the side of the road who she claimed was Jesus. "She started screaming 'He's back!, He's back!' and climbed right out of the sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said Everet Williams, husband of 28-year-old Georgann Williams who was pronounced dead at the scene. "I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped," Willams said. She thought the rapture was happening and was convinced that Jesus was gonna lift her up into the sky," he went on to say. "This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the force," said Paul Madison, first officer on the scene. Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus and discovered that he was on his way to a toga costume party, when the tarp covering the bed of his pickup truck came loose and released twelve blown-up adult-sized dolls filled with helium which then floated up into the sky. Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his friends that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into the air in frustration, just as the Williams' car passed him, and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people up into the sky as they passed by him, according to her husband, who says his wife was a devout Christian. When asked for comments about the twelve adult-sized dolls, Jenkins replied, "This is all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like this to happen."