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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: The Philosopher who wrote (28854)	8/1/2003 6:46:52 AM
From: Guardian	Respond to of 62593

Technologically challenged So you think you are technology challenged? Read this! Take heart, anyone among you who believes you are technologically challenged you "Ain't seen nuthin' yet. This is an excerpt from a Wall Street Journal article: Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the! dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in. A Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen - and hitting the "Send" key. Another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He hand cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them individually. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had told him he was "Bad and an invalid." The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid responses shouldn't be taken personally. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find the printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer, but that his computer still couldn't see the printer. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell computer to t! urn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens." The foot pedal turned out to be the computer's mouse. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand new computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and nothing happened. When asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked, "What power switch? I didn't know it had a power switch." Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for support "I put in the first disk, and that w! as OK." It said to put in the second disk, and she had some problems with the disk. "When it said to put in the third disk, I couldn't! even fit it in..." The user hadn't realized that Insert Disk 2" implied to also remove Disk 1 first. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under windows." The woman responded, No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working fine. And last, but not least: TECH SUPPORT: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape key at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager." CUSTOMER: "I don't have a "P" TECH SUPPORT: "On your keyboard, Bob." CUSTOMER: "What do you mean?" TECH SUPPORT: "P" on your keyboard, Bob." CUSTOMER: "No, I'm not going to do that!"