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Politics : PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Done, gone. who wrote (507119)	12/10/2003 10:27:43 AM
From: Done, gone.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 769667

New Big Boom in Iraq - Jobs In Thanksgiving speech, Bush announces plan to put Iraqis to work (satire) —By Harvey McKinnon, Utne.com December 2003 Issue Last Thursday George Bush made a secret visit to Iraq to announce the launch of a new employment program to put the people of Iraq "Back to Work." Under the dictatorship of Saddam Hussein, the "Iraqi people did not have the opportunity to reach their potential", according to the U.S. president. Here is a transcript of his speech to American troops: "My fellow Americans, we realize that the major reason we are being attacked by the Iraqi people is not because we are an occupying force trying to steal their oil. The real reason Iraqis are attacking us is that they have too much time on their hands. That is to say, if they had to work 14 hours days they'd have no time or energy to be lobbing rockets at our troops. That's why we are going to implement the 'Shock and Awe' Job Plan. First, we will use a strategic Harvard model to determine job 'opportunities'. This model worked well in South Central L.A., which looks a lot like the heavily bombed parts of Baghdad. "Then we will provide training with highly skilled U.S. Marine Sergeants and Starbucks management. "First up in the job field: more employment in pumping oil into U.S. tankers. This highly paid job is the key to Iraqi reconstruction. They give us all of their oil and in return, we give them a blueprint of how to rebuild their country. Then they borrow the money from us to rebuild. It's been a highly successful model that has worked well for Argentina, Poland and Enron. "There are so many other opportunities. For example, you would think that the dozens of Saddam look-a-likes would be unemployable, but nothing could be further from the truth. We have a plan. Once they grow back their mustaches (and our intelligence says they all shaved) then they can get jobs in the new Saddam and Sons Horror Museum. It's easy work. All they have to do is stand around like statues and every now and then jump out at Iraqi visitors and scream, 'I'm back.' Should be good for lots of laughs and, of course, there will be many jobs for ticket takers. "Also, there is a great need for part-time people to clean the sand out of the fax machines in our tanks. Since we'll be there for a long time, this is a job with a future. "There will also be a lot more jobs in museums for people to glue artifacts back together. This could provide years of employment for people with no education and no hope. And the constant glue sniffing won't damage their job prospects. "And there are many arts and culture jobs. For example, in the past, sculptors could only work on Saddam statues. They now have many more creative opportunities. And personally I'm hoping one of them will do a statue of Donald Rumsfeld, saviour of the Middle East. Don deserves to be permanently set in concrete. "Then there are huge opportunities for entrepreneurs, a word I will soon be eliminating from my vocabulary since I just heard it may be French. Our consultants will show people how to make T-shirts with catchy phrases like 'I got bombed in Baghdad' and 'They got bombed in Baghdad.' That'll be a big hit at U.S. fraternities, thus keeping Iraqis safe at home with their sewing machines and away from attacking US soldiers. "Of course, there are a lot of jobs for can-do businessmen to serve the demand for previously banned products. Ordinary Iraqis have long been deprived of booze, porn, drugs and gambling opportunities. The potential job boom, and the corresponding addiction counseling series, will give a real boost to their economy. "Then there are barista jobs at the 357 Starbucks to open next year in Baghdad. Big Al's Pork Palace, one of my Texas favorites, is also scheduled to invade Iraq. More jobs. And MTV plans an Osbournes-style series with the Iraqi Minister of Information's family, if we can get him to sign a contract. "Did I mention cleaning up rubble? Many people, low skilled people, will be employed for the rest of their lives. "So really, there's a lot of opportunities for people who want to work. And if we can't find jobs for every Iraqi who wants to work, maybe we'll import some to the U.S. They can replace immigrant workers from Mexico who, as you know, weren't on our side, I think." utne.com

To: Done, gone. who wrote (507119)	12/10/2003 10:43:10 AM
From: PROLIFE	Respond to of 769667

that's a switch...a leftie using Newsmax???

To: Done, gone. who wrote (507119)	12/10/2003 11:38:38 AM
From: Done, gone.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 769667

Nobel winner blasts rights abuses Iranian Nobel Peace Prize winner Shirin Ebadi has criticised states for infringing human rights "under the cloak of the war on terrorism". In a speech after accepting her award, Ms Ebadi, 56, said the events of 11 September 2001 in the United States had been misused for this end. She also said the fact she had won the prize would inspire masses of women striving to achieve their rights. The Iranian lawyer was the first Muslim woman to be awarded the peace prize. She won the $1.4m prize for her work for the rights of women and children in Iran, in a year when other names mentioned as being in contention included Pope John Paul II and former Czech President Vaclav Havel. Double standards? Ms Ebadi said it was worrying that human rights were being violated by the same Western democracies that had introduced the principles. And she singled out the alleged breaches of the Geneva conventions at the Guantanamo base in Cuba where the US has been holding more than 600 mainly former Taleban suspects for more than two years. "Why is it that some in the past 35 years, dozens of UN resolutions concerning the occupation of the Palestinian territories by the state of Israel have not been implemented promptly?" she said. "Yet, in the past 12 years, the state and people of Iraq, once on the recommendation of the Security Council, and the second time in spite of UN Security Council opposition, were subjected to attack, military assault, economic sanctions, and ultimately, military occupation?" Iranian message "The people of Iran, particularly in recent years, have shown that they deem participation in public affairs to be their right, and that they want to be masters of their own destiny," she said in her acceptance speech. She has vowed to press the Iranian Government to put into practice the international human rights treaties it has signed but not implemented. Ms Ebadi says she will step up her activities and those of her NGO, the Centre for the Defence of Human Rights. One of the main activities of the centre is representing defendants in political cases. She also expressed the hope that political prisoners in Iran would be freed as soon as possible. Mrs Ebadi's award aroused huge controversy in Iran. Right-wing papers denounced the prize as part of a foreign plot to pressure Tehran. Reformist President Mohammad Khatami has described the award as political and not important. Ms Ebadi was the first female judge in her country, but was forced to resign following the Islamic Revolution in 1979. Story from BBC NEWS: news.bbc.co.uk Published: 2003/12/10 13:13:12 GMT © BBC MMIII

To: Done, gone. who wrote (507119)	12/10/2003 4:41:32 PM
From: Lazarus_Long	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 769667

YOU'RE RIGHT! This is serious! And do you know that a President of the United States, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, imprisoned without trial or access to lawyers Japanese-American citizens? For FOUR YEARS? MY GOD! THE REPUBLIC HAS FALLEN! The United States became a dictatorship in 1941! Oh. Wait a minute. FDR was a Democrat. Forget that. All is well. Have you ever stopped to consider just how stupid this crap you post sounds to anyone who happens to know anything? Did you know that Abraham Lincoln suspended habeas corpus during the Civil War, which allowed him to do the same thing? So, really, the US became a dictatorship in 1861, right? Or do you know the dates of any of these events? Now Lincoln actually was within his Constitutional rights: Article I. Section. 9. Clause 2: The Privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended, unless when in Cases of Rebellion or Invasion the public Safety may require it. but the United States Supreme Court ruled that his action was illegal and unconstitutional. He ignored the Court. Not only that, but for a while he considered having the Chief Justice arrested. So what was your target again?