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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Barney who wrote (32811)	1/3/2005 1:46:09 PM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62567

Buzzwords for Managers COLUMN I COLUMN II COLUMN III ------------------- --------------------- -------------------- 0. integrated 0. management 0. options 1. heuristic 1. organizational 1. flexibility 2. systematized 2. monitored 2. capability 3. parallel 3. reciprocal 3. mobility 4. functional 4. digital 4. programming 5. responsive 5. logistical 5. scenarios 6. optional 6. transitional 6. time-phase 7. synchronized 7. incremental 7. projection 8. compatible 8. third-generation 8. hardware 9. futuristic 9. policy 9. contingency The procedure is simple. Think of any three-digit number, and then select the corresponding buzzword from each column. For instance, number 257 produces "systematized logistical projection," a phrase that can be dropped into virtually any report with a sincere ring of decisive, knowledgeable authority. No one will have the remotest idea of what you're talking about, but the important thing is that THEY ARE NOT ABOUT TO ADMIT IT!

To: Barney who wrote (32811)	1/4/2005 10:30:30 AM
From: Proud_Infidel	Respond to of 62567

Texas snow auctioned on eBay Tuesday, January 4, 2005 Posted: 8:23 AM EST (1323 GMT) BROWNSVILLE, Texas (AP) -- Some Texans are hoping to turn a rare snowfall into some cold cash. A 23-year-old Brownsville man has put a three-pound snowball he collected during an unprecedented Rio Grande Valley Christmas snowfall on the eBay auction block. Brownsville received 1.5 inches of snow Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, its first measurable snow since February 14, 1895, according to the National Weather Service. "It's an amazing historical event," seller Oscar J. Garza said. "They've been selling so much stuff on eBay I thought I'd get a good laugh and if I make a little money out of it, oh well." Garza's ball of snow was going for $20.50 early Tuesday -- plus a $20 shipping charge -- with bidding ending on Saturday. Seventeen people had placed bids so far. Garza isn't the only one trying to cash in on the wintry wonderland. Another seller was asking $250,000 for a bowl of Christmas snow from Corpus Christi, sold "as is" without warranty. There were no takers as of early Tuesday.