Rather than paraphrase the teachings of the Church I commend to you a smallish pamphlet, Humanae Vitae, and whatever else appeals to you on the Vatican web site, which is excellent.
vatican.va
I honestly don't feel comfortable trying to catechise someone (even as pleasant a person as you are), in this forum, which probably reflects a number of failures on my part.
I will simply testify that I kept Humanae Vitae handy for years, and I wasn't very happy with it, but over time I came to understand the wisdom contained in it, especially after watching what happened to the marriages of people all around me (and their families). I have been married 25 years next month, and it hasn't always been easy, in fact, some times it was quite hard, but my religious beliefs were a support system when I felt like bailing out. The only other religion I know that is as strong on family ties is Orthodox Judaism, but even Orthodox Jews can get divorced, although I know they don't.
Now here is a question for you. What other human institutions are as old, as large, and as successful as the Catholic Church?
Let's start with old - 2000 years old, give or take a few. I know that other religions have been around much longer, but have they existed in a substantially similar form over time? For example, Protestantism has been around for hundreds of years, but I'd call Protestantism a belief system, not an institution.
And today there are a billion Catholics.
Throughout recorded history, some of the most brilliant minds of all ages belonged to the Church, and still do today.
The institutional wisdom in an ancient, large, successful institution like the Catholic Church is remarkable.
I know what it's like to be trusted with the keys to someone else's home, to someone else's office, to act as a fiduciary. It's an honor, and a burden, but there's judicial oversight that keeps me from even thinking about taking advantage of people. But priests have so much more trust -- they sit in a little room with penitents who tell them the most intimate secrets, the secrets they would not tell anybody else in the entire world. Terrible crimes -- murder, rape, incest, robbery, embezzlement, treason, treachery -- and great weakness -- adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, necrophilia, cruelty. To be forgiven you have to name your sins, every one of them, to the priest.
Who is someone who lives in your community, who you see regularly, at least, in theory. You tell him the horrible things you did while kneeling in a darkened confessional, but you and he both know that he knows who you are. And yet the next time he sees you in daylight he must smile as if nothing happened, and greet you with the same demeanor as he would give an innocent child or a person of great probity.
(This, by the way, is probably the real reason that priests are not allowed to marry, because it's asking too much for them not to unburden themselves to their spouses. And once a secret is out, it's out for all purposes, is the practical truth.)
After 2000 years of hearing confessions, the institution known as the Catholic Church has developed some pretty good insights into human nature.
Kinsey can tell you what you want to do, but big deal, so can the hooker down the street and her pimp.
The Church can tell you what you should do, which is something else entirely different.
I am not saying that the Catholic Church is better than, say, Judaism or Buddhism, only that it works.
[Personally, I think the concept of the Mikva is sort of creepy, but, hey, not my religion. And a lot of the Jewish Sabbath customs are strange, but again, not my religion. And no milkshakes with cheeseburgers? What's up with that? ;^)] |
