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Politics : View from the Center and Left -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Mary Cluney who wrote (27176)8/28/2006 1:56:15 PM
From: one_less  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 541696
 
"The self esteem manipulators (as you call them)are probably people that need self esteem themselves.

I don't see how looking down on these people can be helpful."


Looking down? You seem to have missed the point. No one likes to feel manipulated. It is difficult enough to struggle along with one's own growth and development without having other persons acting as enablers to self appeasement. On some level children know the warm cocoa they are drinking brings a message with it ... "we don't believe in you, but here is something to make you feel good." When you begin to believe the ones offering warm cocoa as an alternative to your own growth, you get addicted to warm cocoa.

Self esteem is not delivered on a platter by feel good surrogate gramma's offering warm cocoa and a blankie in the midst of life's greatest trials, and learning experiences. If this occurs in educational endeavors, it is contradictory to the educational goals ... unfortunately it has become the norm in many settings; it might even help to explain the increase of addictive personalities in our generation.

A real increase in personal autonomy carries with it built in confidence and greater self esteem. Personal autonomy is measured by an ability to realize self-determination in life’s endeavors; a determination that represents your legitimate claim to positive individualism. We can help children to develop this sense of self by guiding or strengthening their ability to significantly influence the outcome of events in their life’s circumstance.

"The greatest evil that can befall a person is that he should come to think ill of himself."
~Goethe~

Children associate meaningfulness and importance to their interpretation of life experiences. The ability to overcome obstacles, influence our environment, and have an impact on events that are viewed as important in life is associated with a self-determination.

Disclaimer: My apologies to grammas everywhere. We love your warm cocoa, just don't interrupt our corporate meetings with it.