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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	10/21/2007 7:11:47 PM
From: J.B.C.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

For example: You state that no president over the past thirty years had the unemployment rate drop below 4.0%! You cite BLS data. My response is that if you go back to 2000 and don't see that during that year it was reported that the unemployment rate hit under 4.0% I will kiss your "glory hole" in the middle of Times Square. Since you name is "TexasDude", I'll make it easy for you, I'll be through Dallas Fort worth on Tuesday, I'll be sure to wear clean underwear for you: bls.gov The rest of your diatribe is merely diarrhea of the mouth, but were used to it from liberals!

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	10/21/2007 7:48:02 PM
From: J.B.C.	Respond to of 62558

PS, I said I can cherry pick data too. You admitted no such thing.

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	10/21/2007 7:49:18 PM
From: J.B.C.	Respond to of 62558

While visiting his niece, an elderly man had a heart attack. The woman drove wildly to get him to the emergency room. After what seemed like a very long wait, the E. R. doctor appeared, wearing his scrubs and a long face. Sadly, he said, "I’m afraid that your uncle’s brain is dead, but his heart is still beating." "Oh, dear," cried the woman, her hands clasped against her cheeks with shock, "We’ve never had a democrat in the family before".

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	10/21/2007 7:51:27 PM
From: J.B.C.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

youtube.com

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	10/21/2007 7:55:50 PM
From: J.B.C.	Respond to of 62558

YOU MIGHT BE A DEMOCRAT IF... * You feel Fidelity means not cheating on your mistress. * You think that pornography corrupts women, but find nothing wrong with a 50 year old president seducing a 21 year old intern. * You cry every May 4th over the four people killed at Kent State, but have never been to the Vietnam Memorial. * Along the same lines, "Four Dead in OHIO" by Neil Young gives you goosebumps, but "19" by Paul Hardcastle means nothing to you. * You say shows like "Leave It to Beaver" are out of touch with America today, while you flip to your soap opera. * You know of the stockpile of biological weapons in Iraq, but think that the US is wrong for not signing the land mines treaty. * You want to know why we don't offer schooling in prisons (hey, isn't that what public schools are for). * You think those stupid ribbons actually accomplish something. * You tout the NAACP, but criticize anyone referring to a black man as a "colored person." * You think a mother has a right to kill an innocent 5 month fetus because her pregnancy would interfere with her career, but feel we shouldn't put to death the man who raped and murdered 14 women. * You feel that banning smoking in public indoor places limits your constitutional rights. * You feel that being convicted of treason is an infringement on your first amendment rights. * You honestly feel that alcoholics deserve social security disability benefits. * You outwardly said "I would have voted for Elizabeth Dole" knowing darn well you wouldn't have because she is a Republican. * You think it is ok for a President to commit perjury on his sex life, but criticize Dan Quayle for spelling potato/potatoe wrong. * You stood on a soapbox demanding that Anita Hill be heard, but want Paula Jones' accusations to be swept under the rug. * You think the guy who drops out of High School and builds your jeep deserves more money than the doctor who went to college for 10 years and saves your kids life. * You sang along to "Give Peace a Chance" during the Gulf War. * You've filed for unemployment within two weeks of getting out of high school. * You went to Woodstock II and felt that it was a significant historical event, changing the way our country thinks. * You own something that says, "Dukakis for President," and still display it. * You've tried to argue in favor of anything based on, "Well, they're gonna do it anyway so..." * You've ever said, "We really should call the ACLU about this." * You believe that a few hundred loggers can find another career, but the defenseless spotted owl must live in its preferred tree. * You ever based an argument on the phrase, "But they can afford a tax hike because..." * You've ever argued that with just one more year of welfare that person will turn it around and get off drugs. * You think Lennon was a brilliant social commentator. * You keep count of how many people you know in each racial or ethnic category. * You believe our government must do it because everyone in Europe does. * After looking at your pay stub you can still say, "America is undertaxed."

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (37615)	11/2/2007 1:22:21 PM
From: Lazarus_Long	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62558

I missed the joke in that. I believe that's exactly what Buckey is talking about. Now why don't we give him a chance at cleaning up this cesspool? OJ: Every nation has to write a book about the Elephant: The French book - The Sex Life of the Elephant or: 1000 ways to cook Elephant The English book - Elephants I have shot on Safari The Welsh book - The Elephant and its influence on Welsh language and culture or: Oes ysgol tocynnau eleffant llanfairpwll nhadau coeden. The American book - How to Make Bigger And Better Elephants The Japanese book - How to Make Smaller And Cheaper Elephants The Greek book - How to Sell Elephants for a Lot of Money The Finnish book - What Do Elephants Think about Finnish People The German book - A Short Introduction to Elephants, Vol 1-6. The Icelandic book - Defrosting an Elephant The Swiss book - Switzerland: The Country Through Which Hannibal Went With His Elephants The Canadian book - Elephants: A Federal or State Issue? The Swedish book - How to reduce your taxes with an elephant.