There were occasions when [Sonya's] boys wouldn’t see her for days at a time, because she would go to work at 5:00 AM and come home around 11:00 PM, going from one job to the next. She was frugal with the family’s finances, cleaning and patching clothes from the Goodwill in order to dress the boys. The family would also go to local farmers and offer to pick corn or other vegetables in exchange for a portion of the yield. She would then can the produce for the kids’ meals. Her actions, and the way she managed the family, proved to be a tremendous influence on Ben and [his brother]. [...]

Determined to turn her sons’ [bad grades] around, Sonya limited their TV time to just a few select programs and refused to let them go outside to play until they’d finished their homework. She was criticized for this by her friends, who said her boys would grow up to hate her. But she was determined that her sons would have greater opportunities than she did. She required them to read two library books a week and give her written reports, even though with her poor education she could barely read them. She would take the papers and review them, scanning over the words and turning pages. Then she would place a checkmark at the top of the page showing her approval.

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More:


historyswomen.com




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Sonya Carson's life motto is: "Learn to do your best and God will do
the rest." She put this motto in practice for herself to motivate her
while raising her sons. And, she used her philosophy of life to
motivate her children to succeed in life.

A woman with only a third grade education, and who was raised in
various foster homes, Carson needed to learn how to work hard to
survive in a life that was surrounded by poverty, despair, and single-
motherhood. Sonya Carson married at 13 years old to Robert Carson,
who was 15 years older than she. He rescued her from her home life of
poverty and abuse. Robert Carson was attentive to Sonya, treating her
like his "little china doll," until they had children. Afterward, he
became secretive and neglectful--- not often coming home, and having
whispered conversations on the telephone. When Ben was eight years
old and his brother, Curtis, was 10 years old, Sonya left her husband
and Detroit. She and her sons moved to Boston to live with her sister
and brother-in-law, William and Jean Avery.

Her life motto served her well while raising her two sons, coping with
anxiety and depression, and trying to make ends meet. Sonya Carson
chose God because "I don't have any friends. I don't have anyone else
to turn to. God, you're going to have to be my friend, my best friend.
And, you're going to have to tell me how to do things and give me
wisdom, because I don't know what to do." (p. 45)

This relationship with God gave her the wisdom to put boundaries
around Curtis and Ben. After Ben brought home an unsatisfactory
report card in fifth grade, she made house rules to enable the boys to
become better students. She restricted their television viewing to two
programs per week. They were required to visit the library each week
and to pick two books to read. Then, Curtis and Ben needed to write a
book report for each book that was read. Afterward, the boys were
required to hand in their book reports to their mother. Carson insisted
on the book reports, library visits, and restricted television viewing
because "... they were not living up to their potential."

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