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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Pami who wrote (4101)	12/9/1997 11:08:00 PM
From: Elmer Flugum	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62547

She's on a manic jag....watch out all!

To: Pami who wrote (4101)	12/10/1997 8:43:00 PM
From: Michael C. Woodward	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62547

Very good, Pam!

To: Pami who wrote (4101)	12/11/1997 9:14:00 PM
From: Walt Gillespie	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62547

Speaking of Newly Weds..... The new husband too-be and his buddies had a real great batchelor party. They had invited a real good looking hooker over for the grooms last nite single. She was really working him into a state of excitement when he slipped and fell face down on his erect tool injuring it. His buddies took him to the doctor who told the groom that he had strained his penis muscles and he would have to put a splint on it. The groom complained that he was getting married the next day so the doctor took four tounge depressors and placed them around the groom's penis and rapped tape around it to keep it imobile telling the groom to leave it there till his wedding night. On the wedding night the groom and the new bride were in the bedroom getting undressed when the bride removed her bra and said, "look at these, unseen by human eyes till now". Then dropping here panties she says, "look at this, untouched by human hands"! The groom dropping his underpants exclaims...."look at this, it ain't even out of the crate yet!"

To: Pami who wrote (4101)	12/26/1997 12:54:00 PM
From: Kip518	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62547

Things I've learned: I've learned that you can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. Age 7 I've learned that when I wave to people in the country, they stop what they are doing and wave back. Age 9 I've learned that although it's hard to admit it, I'm secretly glad my parents are strict with me. Age 15 I've learned that silent company is often more healing than words of advice. Age 24 I've learned that wherever I go, the worlds worst drivers have followed me there. Age 29 I've learned...that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it. Age 39 I've learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don't know how to show it. Age 41 I've learned that children and grandparents are natural allies. Age 47 I've learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone. Age 50 I've learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. Age 52 I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you miss them terribly after they die. Age 53 I've learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life. Age 58 I've learned that if you want to do something positive for your children, try to improve your marriage. Age 61 I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. Age 62 I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. you need to be able to throw something back. Age 64 I've learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually make the right decision. Age 66 I've learned that it pays to believe in miracles. And to tell the truth, I've seen several. Age 73 I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. Age 80 I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. Age 92