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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Gauguin who wrote (5229)	12/15/1997 8:58:00 AM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

Re: Dangerous Answer #2. And I bet I'm in the minority here. THis is where Dan and I parted company and we had to, for the first time, disagree in front of the kids, about a parenting decision. I'm not sure how we resolved this, now that I think about it. I guess we didn't. My feeling is that alcohol is illegal for 16 year olds and because of that, he shouldn't drink at home either. There is no valid reason for a teenager to drink alcohol. I would never give alcohol to someone else's child; why would I allow mine to drink it? THey see me drink wine but know I never drink and get behind the wheel and we are very careful not to make comments in front of the boys like, "Wow. BAd day. I need a drink" or equate alcohol with "feeling good". Until you develop a taste for beer, it's disgusting and teens drink it either to look cool or get drunk. Both poor reasons. Logic always appeals to CW, thank heavens. Parenting is a tightrope. I have a strong belief that kids need very firm guidelines from us to disagree with and argue about and rebel against. we are suposed to be the bad guys! I'm not here to be CW's best friend, but to teach and also live by values I think are important. He will make his own choices. We told him he'd reached the age where we no longer could control his actions, only respond to them and rely on what we hoped was his own good judgment. He's 16 and he's going to screw up. As Alexa said, fate enters in here and what a terrifying thought. Some kids make it; some don't. Every time he walks out of the house, I think about that, and send up a prayer to whatever forces are out there, but he's a great kid and so far his decisions are pretty commendable. it's the rest of the world I worry about.