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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Goalie who wrote (4731)	2/21/1998 10:41:00 PM
From: Darth Trader	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

What's the difference between Maria B and a catfish? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > one has big lips and whiskers and the others a fish.

To: Goalie who wrote (4731)	2/23/1998 12:23:00 PM
From: OldAIMGuy	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

A pheasant was standing in a field chatting to a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of yonder tree", sighed the pheasant, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The pheasant pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. And so on. Finally, after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Whereupon he was spotted by a farmer who dashed into the farmhouse, emerged with a shotgun, and shot the pheasant right out of the tree. The Moral of the Story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.