A guy went to Las Vegas, and won big, really big, in one
of the
casinos. When you win big in Vegas the casino will give you
free
things, like meals, show tickets, or rooms, this is all
designed to
keep you there so that you will lose what money you have
won. After
winning fifty thousand dollars at the crap table, the
casino decided
to give the guy a night in the penthouse suite.
The guy went up to the room, opened the big double
doors, and
stepped into a three room suite. The room is on a corner of
the hotel
and two walls are nothing but windows, with a fantastic
view of the
city. There's a wet bar in one corner, with a big screen
T.V.
The guy dropped his bag of money in a chair and stood
looking out
the windows at the city. He realized he was all alone and
needed
someone to share his good fortune. He called the front
desk and told
the clerk to send up one of the best, high-priced call
girls in the
city.
Thirty minutes later there was a knock on the door. The
guy opened
it to find the most gorgeous girl he has ever seen. Long
blond hair,
short red dress, and spiked heels. She walked into the
room. The guy
went to the bar and fixed two drinks; he gave one to the
hooker, and
drank one himself.
"Now, down to business," he began, "how much for a hand
job?"
The hooker said, "Honey, a hand job is $500.00"
"What, that's outrageous!" he said.
"Come over here," she said walking towards one of the
windows, "see
that strip mall over there," pointing out the window, "I
own the last
two stores on the end. I was able to buy those stores with
the money
I saved from giving hand jobs. I must be pretty damn good.
"
"All right, screw it, money is no object," our lonely
friend
replied. A half hour after she's done, the guy is sitting
on the
couch reveling in ecstasy. He gets up, goes to the bar and
made two
more drinks. He gives one to the hooker and drinks one
himself.
"That was the best hand job I have ever had. How much for a
blow job?"
She replied, "Honey, a blow job is $5,000."
"What, that's outrageous!" he exclaimed.
"Come over here," she said walking towards another one
of the
windows, "see that hotel and casino over there on the
corner,"
pointing out the window, "I own that, I was able to buy it
with the
money I saved from giving blow jobs. I must be pretty damn
good."
"Oh, all right, screw it, money is no object," he said,
giving her
$5 grand. An hour after she's done, the guy was laying on
the couch,
head rolled back, eyes rolled up inside his head, a little
drool
coming out of the corner of his mouth. He got up, barely
able to
stand, staggered over to the bar, mixed two more drinks,
gave one to
the hooker, and drank one himself.
"My god, that was the best blow job I have ever had,
I've gotta
know, how much for some pussy?"
The hooker looked at him and replied, "Honey, if I had a
pussy, I
would OWN this whole city!" |
