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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Thomas Scharf who wrote (5008)	3/18/1998 6:59:00 PM
From: Steve LaRiviere	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

This was given to me by a woman at work: TOP TEN THINGS MEN WOULD DO IF THEY WOKE UP AND HAD A VAGINA FOR A DAY 10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers. 9. Squat over a hand-held mirror for an hour and a half. 8. See if they could finally do splits. 7. See if it's truly possible to launch a ping pong ball 20 feet. 6. Cross their legs without rearranging. 5. Get picked up in a bar in less than 10 minutes BEFORE closing. 4. Have consecutive multiple orgasms and still be ready for more without sleeping first. 3. Go to the gynecologist for a pelvic exam and ask to have it recorded on video. 2. Sit on the edge of the bed and pray for breasts, too. and the NUMBER ONE thing men would do if they woke up with a vagina... 1. Finally find that damn G-spot!!!!!

To: Thomas Scharf who wrote (5008)	3/19/1998 12:11:00 AM
From: Thomas Scharf	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

Haiku Error Messages: Everything is gone; Your life's work has been destroyed. Squeeze trigger (yes/no)? - - - - - - - - - - - - I'm sorry, there's -- um -- insufficient -- what's-it-called? The term eludes me ... - - - - - - - - - - - - Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams. - - - - - - - - - - - - Seeing my great fault Through darkening blue windows I begin again - - - - - - - - - - - - The code was willing, It considered your request, But the chips were weak. - - - - - - - - - - - - A file that big? It might be very useful. But now it is gone. - - - - - - - - - - - - Errors have occurred. We won't tell you where or why. Lazy programmers. - - - - - - - - - - - - Server's poor response Not quick enough for browser. Timed out, plum blossom. - - - - - - - - - - - - Login incorrect. Only perfect spellers may enter this system. - - - - - - - - - - - - wind catches lily scatt'ring petals to the wind: segmentation fault - - - - - - - - - - - - First snow, then silence. This thousand dollar screen dies so beautifully. - - - - - - - - - - - - The Tao that is seen Is not the true Tao, until You bring fresh toner. - - - - - - - - - - - - Yesterday it worked Today it is not working Windows is like that - - - - - - - - - - - - To have no errors Would be life without meaning No struggle, no joy - - - - - - - - - - - - You step in the stream, but the water has moved on. This page is not here. - - - - - - - - - - - - Hal, open the file Hal, open the damn file, Hal open the, please Hal - - - - - - - - - - - - The ten thousand things How long do any persist? Netscape, too, has gone. - - - - - - - - - - - - Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank.