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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: bob who wrote (5167)	3/31/1998 2:13:00 PM
From: Wowzer	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62569

You know you made it to heaven when: Italians are the cooks French are your lovers English are the police and the Germans are the engineers. You know you're in hell when: Italians are in charge of finance French are the welcoming committee English are the cooks and the Germans are the police.

To: bob who wrote (5167)	3/31/1998 6:47:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62569

God looks over the millions of people and says "Welcome to Heaven. I want the women to go with Saint Peter, and the men to form two lines. Make one line of the men that dominated their women on earth, and the other of men who were dominated by their women." There's much movement, but eventually the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were dominated is 100 miles long. The line of men that dominated women has only one man. God gets angry and says, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image and you were all dominated by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud. Learn from him!" He turns to the man and says, "Tell them, my son. How did you manage to be the only one on that line?" The man says, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bill Clinton was campaigning at a old age retirement home. He went up to a woman and shook her hand and said "Do you know who I am?" "No," replied the old woman, "but if you go to the front desk, they'll tell you!"