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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Jay who wrote (5343)	4/22/1998 7:58:00 AM
From: Miguel M. de la O	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

HOW MANY COLLEGE STUDENTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB: Vanderbilt: Two-one to call the electrician and one to call daddy to pay the bill Princeton: Two-one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician Brown: Eleven-one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience Dartmouth: None-Hanover doesn't have electricity Cornell: Two-One to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure Penn: Only one, but he gets six credits for it Columbia: Seventy-six-one to change the lightbulb, fifth to protest the lightbulb's right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter protest Yale: None-New Haven looks better in the dark Harvard: One-he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him MIT: Five-one to design a nuclear powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Boston using that nuked lightbulb two to install it, and one to write the computer program that controls the wall switch Vassar: Eleven-one to screw it and ten to support its sexual orientation Middlebury: Five-One to change the lightbulb and four to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion Stanford: One, dude Oberlin: Three-one to change it and two to figure out how to get high off the old one Holy Cross: Ten-one to change it, one back up if the first guy's too drunk and the other eight to pray that it works Georgetown: Four-one to change it, one to call Congress about their progress, and two to throw the old bulb at the American U. students. Williams: The whole student body-when you're snowed in, there's nothing else to do Tufts: Two-one to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how he did it as well as an Ivy League student Sarah Lawrence: Five-one to change the bulb and four to do an interpretative dance about it. Swarthmore: Eight-it's not that one isn't smart enough to do it, it's just that they're all violently twitching from too much stress Boston University: Four-one to change the bulb and two to check his math homework Wesleyan: Wesleyan's boycotting GE... you know, military-industrial complex and all that stuff. Connecticut College: None-they are all too drunk to notice Virginia: Thirteen-Ten to form student committee to vote on whether changing light bulbs is a violation of the Honor Code, one to change the bulb, one to hold the keg the he's standing on, and another to attribute electricity to Mr. Jefferson. Bowdoin: Three-one to ski down to the general store and buy the bulb, one to take the chairlift back to school, and one to screw it in Boston College: Seven-one to change the light bulb and six to throw a party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time Santa Clara University: One-but you would never know about it because only Cal. and Stanford gets press for changing their lightbulbs U. of Fla: The light's out?