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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: david james who wrote (5699)	6/2/1998 11:38:00 PM
From: Jack Colton	Respond to of 62549

Wooooah... Remind me never to go there. Where is Marin anyway? Or should I ask "What is Marin?" never mind... I found it.... Marin County, CA?

To: david james who wrote (5699)	6/2/1998 11:40:00 PM
From: Jack Colton	Respond to of 62549

Twin brothers were named Joe and John Jones. The single brother was the proud owner of a dilapidated boat. It happened that John's wife died the same day that Joe's boat sank. A few days later a kindly old lady met Joe on the street and mistaking him for John, said "Oh Mr.Jones, I am sorry to hear about your great loss. You must feel terrible." Then Joe spoke up saying "well, I'm not the least bit sorry, she was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelt like a dead fish and even the first time I got into her she made water faster than anything I had ever seen. She has a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front. The hole got bigger every time I used her and she leaked like anything. But this is what finished her. Four guys from the other side of town looking for a good time, asked if I would rent her to them. I warned them that she wasn't so hot, but they said they would take a crack at her anyway. The result was the crazy fools all tried to to get into her at one time and it was to much for her. She cracked down the middle." The old lady dropped to the ground in a dead faint

To: david james who wrote (5699)	6/2/1998 11:42:00 PM
From: Jack Colton	Respond to of 62549

For those who are computer literate, find the true meaning of the computer acronyms while for those who feel that computer acronyms are GREEK to them, here is the translation ... PCMCIA People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms ISDN It Still Does Nothing APPLE Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity SCSI System Can't See It DOS Defective Operating System BASIC Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control IBM I Blame Microsoft DEC Do Expect Cuts CD-ROM Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months OS/2 Obsolete Soon, Too. WWW World Wide Wait MACINTOSH Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs PENTIUM Produces Erroneous Numbers Thru Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics COBOL Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language AMIGA A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction LISP Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis MIPS Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed WINDOWS Will Install Needless Data On Whole System GIRO Garbage In Rubbish Out MICROSOFT Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers RISC Reduced Into Silly Code