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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Henry Volquardsen who wrote (6099)	7/10/1998 10:32:00 AM
From: Smilodon	Respond to of 62549

43 Reasons why it's great to be a guy Recycled, but still funny.... > > 43 REASONS WHY IT'S GREAT TO BE A GUY > > > > 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. > > > > 2. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. > > > > 3. Monday Night Football. > > > > 4. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. > > > > 5. You can open all your own jars. > > > > 6. Dry cleaners and haircutters don't rob you blind. > > > > 7. When clicking through the channels, you don't have to stall on > every > > shot of someone crying. > > > > 8. You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you > go. > > > > 9. You can go to the bathroom without a support group. > > > > 10. Your last name stays put. > > > > 11. You can leave a hotel bed unmade. > > > > 12. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that > everyone > > secretly hates you. > > > > 13. You can kill your own food. > > > > 14. The garage is all yours. > > > > 15. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. > > > > > 16. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes. > > > > 17. Wedding plans take care of themselves. > > > > 18. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still > > > be your friend. > > > > 19. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack. > > > > 20. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry. > > > > 21. You don't have to shave below your neck. > > > > 22. If you're 34 and single nobody notices. > > > > 23. Everything on your face stays its original color. > > > > 24. Chocolate is just another snack. > > > > 25. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat. > > > > 26. Flowers fix everything. > > > > 27. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. > > > > 28. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is > coming > > by. > > > > 29. Car mechanics tell you the truth. > > > > 30. You don't care if someone notices your new haircut. > > > > 31. You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for hours without > > even thinking "He must be mad at me." > > > > 32. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look > like > > him. > > > > 33. Gray hair and wrinkles add character. > > > > 34. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100. > > > > 35. If you retain water, it's in a canteen. > > > > 36. You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift. > > > > 37. You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom. > > > > 38. If you don't call yourÿ buddy when you say you will, he won't tell > > > your friends you've changed. > > > > 39. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might > > > become lifelong buddies. > > > > 40. If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it with a hammer > > > and throw it across the room. > > > > 41. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. > > > > 42. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries. > > > > > 43. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So... notice > > anything different?" > > *