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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Chip Anderson who wrote (6176)	7/16/1998 12:56:00 PM
From: High Grader	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Along a similar line...the Research Council of Canada once gave a grant to see how long an Elephant could go without going. Three scientists were hired to administer the project and spent 1/3 of the grant money designing and inserting cork for the elephant. The second third of the money was spent buying all of the elephant's favorite foods. The elephant went for several days eating happily while the scientists made observations, measuring weight gain, heart rate, and so on. Then the elephant slowed down and began to moan pitifully. It began to sweat a lot and tremble at the knees. The scientists began to get phone calls from animals rights groups and a call form Ottawa, the capital of Canada clinched it. The cork was to be removed. "Not me !" Said the first Scientist firmly. "Did you hear about that guy in Germany who got the Darwin award?" said the second. "Wait!" said the third, " We still have 1/3 of the research grant left and we must spend it all or we will never get funding from the Canadian Government again." So all night they planned and planned and finally after building a dummy elephant's rear end with a ladder placed up against it, they purchased a monkey and trained the monkey to climb the ladder and remove the facsimile cork, rewarding the monkey with a banana. Meantime the press had found out about this story. Green Peace was demonstrating and there were even calls form the United Nations. Finally all was ready. The press, TV cameras and thousands of demonstrators were on the scene. The monkey climbed the ladder placed behind the real elephant and gave the cork a good pull. Afterwards the scientists were interviewed by Barbara Walters who asked each in turn what their impressions were. "I will never forget it," said the first. " It was like a Niagra Falls of elephant excrement." "I will never forget it," said the second, 'It was like Mt. St. Helens erupting." Barabara changed her questioning technique when she got to the third scientist. "What will you always remember about this?" she asked. The third scientist replied, "The look on that poor monkey's face as he tried to get the cork back in."