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Pastimes : Another Good Reason Not To Be Married -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: knight who wrote (2491)	9/12/1998 9:49:00 PM
From: Jeff	Respond to of 6545

WOMEN'S LANGUAGE TRANSLATED Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No I'm sorry. = You'll be sorry. We need... = I want It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now. Do what you want... = You'll pay for this later. We need to talk... = I need to complain Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to. I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs. This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house. I want new curtains = ...and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper..... Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there! I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep. Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive. How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like. I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV. Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful. You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me. Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you're dead. Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep. I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important. ********************************* In response to What's wrong?: The same old thing = Nothing Nothing = Everything Everything = My PMS is acting up Nothing, really = It's just that you're such an asshole! ***************************************************************

To: knight who wrote (2491)	9/12/1998 9:51:00 PM
From: Jeff	Read Replies (4) \| Respond to of 6545

MEN'S LANGUAGE TRANSLATED I'm hungry. = I'm hungry. I'm sleepy. = I'm sleepy. I'm tired. = I'm tired. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. Nice dress! = Nice cleavage You look tense, let me give you a massage. = I want to fondle you. What's wrong? = I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of this. What's wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now? What's wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question. I'm bored. = Do you want to have sex? I love you. = Let's have sex now. I love you, too. = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now! Yes, I like the way you cut your hair. = I liked it better before. Yes, I like the way you cut your hair. = $50 and it doesn't look that much different! Let's talk. = I am trying to impress you by showing you that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me. "Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys. *************************** While Shopping I like that one better. = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home! I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together. = I'm gay.

To: knight who wrote (2491)	9/12/1998 10:01:00 PM
From: Jeff	Respond to of 6545

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."