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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: gypsy who wrote (7293)	10/14/1998 9:17:00 PM
From: doby	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62543

Cripe's, and those are the bad pick up lines? I'll bet the guy who can burp the loudest will win your heart Gypsy, cause you've got class baby. <grin> You must be a real knockout HunniBunni if those lines don't work. <gg> thanks for sharing mikey

To: gypsy who wrote (7293)	10/14/1998 11:31:00 PM
From: jpmac	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62543

So what about "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold against me?" Dang if I hadn't heard that song for years when someone pointed out to me it was a double entenwhatsit. Knowing that can change the answer.

To: gypsy who wrote (7293)	10/15/1998 4:42:00 PM
From: DScottD	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62543

PITHY SAYINGS 5 out of 4 people have trouble with statistics. According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist. Always remember, you're unique - just like everybody else. Alzheimer's Advantage # 1 -- new friends everyday. Alzheimer's Advantage # 2 -- you can help plan your own surprise parties. Am I ignorant or apathetic? I don't know and I don't care. As I said before, I never repeat myself. Bigamy: One mate too many. Monogamy: Same idea. Criminal lawyer: Isn't that redundant? Don't steal, the government hates competition. Dyslexia, it can warn without striking. Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid. I can never find time to procrastinate. I can't remember the last time I forgot something. I know it all... I just can't remember it simultaneously. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not sure. Where am I? I'm in a phone booth at the corner of walk and don't walk. I've told you a million times-stop exaggerating. If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kick-boxing. If you can't laugh at yourself, I'll do it for you. Illiterate? Write for a free brochure. In an atomic war, all men will be cremated equal. Insomnia isn't anything to lose sleep over. Jerk: What is found on both ends of fishing lines. Logic: The art of being wrong with confidence. Mosquito: Designed by God to make flies seem nicer. Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative. Prunes give you a run for your money. He kept saying that I didn't listen to him, or something like that. Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark. Stick: A boomerang that doesn't work. Synonym: Word used when you can't spell the one you wanted. The Apathy Anonymous meeting was canceled due to lack of interest. The best defense against logic is stupidity. The Procrastinators Anonymous meeting has been put off till next week. Virus check complete: All viruses functioning normally. I'm not afraid of flying... I'm afraid of crashing. I'm not schizophrenic, and neither am I. I'm so broke, I'm thinking about starting my own government. You can't teach people to be lazy... either they have it or they don't.