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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: gypsy who wrote (7315)	10/15/1998 6:01:00 PM
From: Lamont	Respond to of 62547

My husband was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and I was sitting at his bedside. His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, "You're beautiful." Flattered, I continued my vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later he woke up and said, "You're cute." "What happened to 'beautiful'?" I asked him. "The drugs are wearing off," he replied.

To: gypsy who wrote (7315)	10/15/1998 6:03:00 PM
From: Lamont	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62547

One dismal rainy night, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was startled to see a dripping wet, naked woman sitting in the back seat. "Where to?" he stammered. "Union Station," answered the woman. "You got it," he said, taking another long glance in the mirror. The woman caught him staring at her and asked, "Just what the hell are you looking at, driver?" "Well ma'am, I noticed that you're completely naked, and I was just wondering how you'll pay your fare." The woman spread her legs, put her feet up on the front seat, smiled at the driver and said, "Does THIS answer your question?" Still looking in the mirror, the cabbie asked, "Got anything smaller?"

To: gypsy who wrote (7315)	10/16/1998 8:10:00 AM
From: Henry Volquardsen	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 62547

Some aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor, to the student from Arkansas, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. "And what is the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma. "Elation," she said. "And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "How about the opposite of woe?" The Texan replied, "Sir , I believe that would be 'giddy up'."