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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Henry Volquardsen who wrote (7384)	10/19/1998 3:04:00 PM
From: Tomato	Respond to of 62547

> Wisdom Off The Walls .... > > The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open. > --Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL > > A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to > have trouble with it. > --Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas. > > Never trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die. > --Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL > > Beauty is only a light switch away. > --Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina. > > I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards. > --Houghton Library, Harvard University. Cambridge, Mass > > Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?" > --Rest stop off Route 81. West Virginia. > > God made pot. Man made beer. Whom do you trust? > --The Irish Times, Washington, D.C. > > Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. > --The Bayou, Baton Rouge, Louisiana. > > No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting > up with her shit. > --Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill. Chapel Hill, North Carolina. > > Make love, not war. Hell, do both, get married! > -- Women's restroom, The Filling Station. Bozeman, Montana. > > At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry. > --Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona. > > It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. > --Written in the dust on the back of a bus. Wickenburg, AZ > > God is dead. -Nietzsche; Nietzsche is dead. -God > --The Tombs Restaurant. Washington, D.C. > > If voting could really change things, it would be illegal. > --Revolution Books. New York, New York.

To: Henry Volquardsen who wrote (7384)	10/19/1998 3:09:00 PM
From: SIer formerly known as Joe B.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62547

I just got a hilarious piece of mail. It's a credit card application from First USA Titanium Mastercard. In big letters on the envelope, above a one inch Coca Cola logo, it says "Act Now and You Could Get 2 Free cases of Coca Cola or Diet Coke! (48 Cans Free!)See details inside. This is supposed to make me want one of their credit cards? Well, at least I got a laugh before tearing it up and discarding it. Anybody have a card with these jokers?