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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (7455)	10/22/1998 1:12:00 PM
From: Henry Volquardsen	Respond to of 62541

LONG LIVE NORM!!!! If you ever wished you could remember Norm's greetings on Cheers, here you go. "What's shaking Norm?" "All four cheeks & a couple of chins." "What's new Normie?" "Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer." "What'd you like Normie?" "A reason to live. Give me another beer." "What'll you have Normie?" "Well, I'm in a gambling mood Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap." "Looks like beer, Norm." "Call me Mister Lucky." "Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you?" "Like a baby treats a diaper." "What's the story Mr. Peterson?" "The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending." "Hey Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you." "I know, if she calls, I'm not here." "Beer, Norm?" "Have I gotten that predictable? Good." "What's going on Mr. Peterson?" "A flashing sign in my gut that says, 'Insert beer here.'" >"Whatcha up to Norm?" "My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall." "How's it going Mr. Peterson?" "Poor." "I'm sorry to hear that." "No, I mean pour." "How's life treating you Norm?" "Like it caught me sleeping with its wife." "Women. Can't live with 'em....pass the beer nuts." "What's going down, Normie?" "My butt cheeks on that bar stool." "Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?" "Alright, but stop me at one....make that one-thirty." "How's it going Mr. Peterson?" "It's a dog eat dog world, Woody & I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear." "What's the story Norm?" "Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer." "What's going on Mr. Peterson?" "The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody." "Can I pour you a beer Mr. Peterson?" "A little early isn't it, Woody?" "For a beer?" "No, for stupid questions."

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (7455)	10/22/1998 1:22:00 PM
From: High Grader	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62541

A rather wispy young man was having a shower in the local gym and noticed a black man across the way toweling off. The black man was exceptionally well endowed and the young fellow expressed his admiration and envy. The black man decided to have a bit of fun, and told him is it was easy to attain a larger member. All he had to do was tie a 10lb bag of sugar on the end and leave it hanging there for a few days. A few days later the black man is walking down the street and sees the fellow from the gym coming towards him. The poor fellow is obviously in great pain and the alarmed black man asks him how it is going. "Well..." he says. " I tied a 20 lb bag of sugar on the end and it is really working. I have gained an extra three inches and you know something else? It is starting to turn black too...."