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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Buckey who wrote (7476)	10/23/1998 4:37:00 PM
From: Miles Tailor	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Subject: The best chain letter I have ever received > > Hello, my name is Alfonso Merkin. I am suffering from rare and deadly > diseases, poor scores on final exams, lack of sexual activity, fear of > being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not > sending out 50 billion fucking forwards sent to me by people who > actually believe that if you send them, that poor 6 year old girl in > Arkansas with lung cancer brought on by second-hand smoke from the > cigarettes smoked by the big bad men who kidnapped her and took > pornographic pictures of her for use on their child pornography web > site will get 6 fucking cents every time you send me the letter. Do > you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone > you send "his" email to $1000? How fucking stupid are you? Ooooh, > looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid > by every Victoria's Secret model in the catalog! > > What a bunch of bullshit. So basically, this message is a big FUCK > YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to > send me stupid chainmail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter > leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep > for not continuing the chain which was started by Jesus in 5 A.D. and > was brought to this country > by midgetpilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year > 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest > continuous streak of blatant stupidity. Fuck them. If you're going to > forward something, at least send something mildly amusing. I've seen > all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, > wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from > some "omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care. > Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually > contributing to by sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own > unpopularity. > > P.S. Please forward this to at least 50 of your best friends! You > will definitely get laid.