Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: doby who wrote (7513)	10/27/1998 12:46:00 PM
From: Tomato	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62547

All the following have been posted at one time or another, but not for a while... > >> Confucius say... > >> Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Passionate kiss, like spider web, lead to undoing of fly. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Better to be pissed off than pissed on. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> He who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Boy who go to sleep with stiff problem wake up with solution in hand. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day long. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Couple on 7 day honeymoon make hole weak. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Girl who sit on jockey's lap get hot tip. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Girl who sits on Judge's lap gets honorable discharge. > >> > >> Confucius say.... > >> Lady who go camping must beware of evil intent. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets, not feeling crazy, > >feeling nuts. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> He who run behind bus get exhausted. > >> > >> Confucius say: > >> Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck. > >> > >> Confucius say... > >> He who fishes in others' holes often catches crab

To: doby who wrote (7513)	10/27/1998 1:33:00 PM
From: gypsy	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62547

mmmm, "you all come back, now, you hear" LOL ze gyp

To: doby who wrote (7513)	10/27/1998 8:03:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Respond to of 62547

This guy was walking down a street in Texas and this hooker says, "Say, wanna have a good time? We do things in a big way down here in Texas." "Sure," he says and they were off to the nearest motel. She takes off her clothes and he keeps staring at her. She says, "Is this the first pussy you seen since you crawled out of one?" The guy says, "No, just the first one I've seen big enough to crawl back into." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ A lady who picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the cashier, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the cashier got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear: "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX, SUPERSIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store apparently Is understood the word "tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom: "DOYOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER?" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ One evening Snow White decided she was sleepy and announced to the seven dwarfs that she was going to bed. After the usual lengthy round of "Good Nights" she went upstairs. Immediately all seven dwarfs rushed outside and began standing on each others shoulders beneath Snow White's bedroom window. Tonight was Grumpy's turn to be on the top and as he was the only one Who could see in the window it was his duty to inform the other dwarfs what she was doing. After a minute or two he hollered down, "She's taking off her blouse!" and this was echoed down the stack "taking off her blouse," "she's taking off her blouse," "blouse is coming off," "taking off her blouse," etc. Next Grumpy yelled, "She's taking off her skirt," which was followed by the echoes "taking off her skirt," "she's taking off her skirt," "skirt's coming off," "taking off her skirt," etc. Of course the next line from Grumpy was, "She's taking off her bra!" and the echo chorus went down the line. Then, "She's taking off her panties!" which again cascaded down the dwarf tower. Finally Grumpy looked around and from his vantage height saw someone coming through the woods so he yelled, "Someone's coming!" and from the next dwarf to the bottom dwarf was heard, "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too."