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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Intrepid1 who wrote (7888)11/23/1998 6:59:00 AM
From: Ken Robbins  Respond to of 62551
 
A small scrawny guy was sitting at this bar with a drink in front of him. In walk this big burley bully type and proceeds to bump the little guy off his stool, picks up the little guy's drink and downs it in one gulp.

The little guy starts crying. The bully says, "Oh, come on buddy, don't cry. I'll buy another drink", but the little guy keeps on sobbing. Big guy: "What's the matter, buddy?" Little guy replies: "This has been a really terrible day:

-"I got fired for being late for work today!
-"I went out to the parking lot and someone had stolen my car!
-"I walked 6 miles home and found my wife in bed with a strange dude!
-"I was sitting here ready to kill myself, and you walked in and drank all my poison!!!"



To: Intrepid1 who wrote (7888)11/23/1998 10:09:00 AM
From: SIer formerly known as Joe B.  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62551
 


Three baseball fans were on their way to a game when one noticed
a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road.

They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk. Out of respect and propriety, the Cubs fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast. The Red Sox fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead, the Yankee fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.

The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his
inspection. First, he lifted up the Cubs cap, replaced it, and wrote
down some notes. Next, he lifted the Sox cap, replaced it, and wrote
down some more notes. The officer then lifted the Yankees cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time.

The Yankee fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a
pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and
looking?"

Well," said the officer. "I am simply surprised. Normally when I look
under a Yankees hat, I find an asshole."