Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Market Tracker who wrote (8223)	12/29/1998 9:44:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Respond to of 62590

This little Italian boy and this little Jewish boy lived about a block apart in the neighborhood and basically grew up together. The Jewish boy was the son of a jeweler and the Italian boy was the son of a hitman. Oddly enough, they had the same birthday. Well, for their 12th birthday, the little Jewish boy gets a Rolex watch and the little Italian boy gets a .22 Baretta. The next day they are out on the street corner comparing their presents and neither is happy so they switch gifts with each other. The little Italian boy goes home to show his father and his father is NOT pleased! "What're you, nuts? Lemme tell you something, you idiot!! Some day you're gonna meet a nice girl, you're gonna wanna settle down and get married. You'll have a few kids, all that stuff. THEN one day, you're gonna come home andfind your wife in bed with another man. What the hell ya gonna do??? Look at your watch and say, 'Hey, how long you gonna be?'" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Three men die in a car accident Christmas eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven .On entering they must present something Christmassy. The first man searches his pocket, and finds some mistletoe, so he is allowed in. The second man presents a Christmas card, so he is also allowed in. The third man pulls out a pair of panties. Confused at this last gesture , St. Peter asks "how do these represent Christmas?" He answered, "they're Carol's." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Two Italian construction workers were in the field on an extremely hot day working.. the one says to the other "hey how come we do all a da work and he gets all a da money?" pointing to the supervisor. The other says, "I don't know, go ask him." So Guido goes up to the supervisor and says "Hey, how come we do all a da work and you get all a da money?" The supervisor says "Intelligence". Guido says "what is this intelligence?" The supervisor puts his hand on a tree and says "Hita my hand as hard as you can!" Guido winds up and with all his might tries to hit the supervisors hand. Just as he almost does the supervisor pulls his hand away and Guido hits the tree! The supervisor says "Thats intelligence". Still smarting Guido goes back to his coworker and his coworker says "Hey what did he say?" With a sheepish look on his face Guido puts his hand on his face and says "hita my hand as hard as you can. . ."