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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: broken_cookie who wrote (8276)	1/4/1999 5:16:00 PM
From: Bob Bryenton	Respond to of 62578

(For the Canadians) Mindful of the general ambience of New Year's resolutions, it occurs to me that nobody should ever have created Quebec in the first place. This is because you should never make provinces you can't keep. I know that this one will go over like a lead balloon in Ottawa, but, on the other hand, if there is one place a lead balloon could go over it is Ottawa, with all its hot air. Bob

To: broken_cookie who wrote (8276)	1/5/1999 1:05:00 AM
From: ManyMoose	Respond to of 62578

THIS JOKE CAN'T BE ORIGINAL, ALTHOUGH I WROTE IT FROM SCRATCH MYSELF TO MAKE A POINT ON ANOTHER THREAD. IT WAS NOT APPRECIATED THERE, BUT PERHAPS BY DEFINITION THERE IS A SENSE OF HUMOR HERE. Clinton, on the other side of his last near-death experience, is confronted by two doors. A sign on one door says: "Heaven 'is' behind this door." A sign on the other door says: "Hell 'is' behind this door." Clinton chooses the door marked "Heaven" and opens it. A cloven-hooved devil reaches out and pulls him into the fires of hell. "You see, Mr. Clinton," the devil says, "it all depends on what your definition of the word 'is' was." Webster: 'Is', the third person singular, present indicative, of 'be'. Alternative definitions: none