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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Edwarda who wrote (9025)3/22/1999 1:56:00 PM
From: Calvin Scott  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62562
 
Only in America....

Only in America-can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance...
Only in America-are there handicap parking places in front of
a skating rink...
Only in America-do drugstores make the sick walk all the
way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions...
Only in America-do people order double cheese burgers, a
large fry, and a diet coke...
Only in America-do banks leave both doors open and then
chain the pens to the counters...
Only in America-do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars
in the driveway and leave useless junk in the garage...
Only in America---do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from
someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...
Only in America-do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and
buns in packages of eight...
Only in America-do we use the word "politics" to describe the
process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics"
meaning "blood-sucking creatures"...
Only in America-can a homeless combat veteran live in a
cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House...
Onlly in America-do they have drive-up ATM machines with
Braille lettering.