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Pastimes : Kosovo -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Les H who wrote (2572)4/7/1999 9:20:00 PM
From: Les H  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 17770
 
As Bomb Supplies Dwindle, Military Is Looking For Something New to Drop on Yugoslavia

As NATO air strikes intensify, U.S. bomb
supplies have dropped to their lowest levels
since the Mexican-American War. U.S.
military officials have lobbied Congress for an
increase in military spending, but Clinton has
threatened to veto any legislation that would
seek to replenish military arsenals. Said White
House Press Secretary, Joe Lockhart, "The
President will not allow Congress to increase
military spending by one cent until we save
Social-Security. Our military leaders have been put on notice that they will need to
develop creative ways of carrying out the war in Yugoslavia."

Two hours after Lockhart's press conference, the Joint Chiefs unveiled a plan to
drop watermelons on Serb Forces. When asked if the watermelons would be
effective in diminishing Serb military strength, one military spokesman told reporters,
"Our preliminary tests have shown that a watermelon traveling at Mach one can
inflict substantial damage. We could be loading warplanes with the deadly fruit as
early as tonight.

In a related story, Democrats on Capital Hill have introduced legislation that would
require a 10 day waiting period and mandatory FBI background checks for
super-market shoppers seeking to purchase watermelons.



To: Les H who wrote (2572)4/7/1999 9:21:00 PM
From: Les H  Respond to of 17770
 
Clinton Threatens To Send Larry Flynt to Kosovo

As the Kosovo crisis continues to drag on, Clinton is looking for a way to deliver a swift knock-out punch. While speaking at a DNC fundraiser in Detroit Clinton told supporters, "The time has come to take the war in Yugoslavia to the next level. I have decided to unleash a man whom I consider to be a patriot and a friend. I have seen this man in action and have been impressed by his ability to get results. The man I am talking about is Larry Flynt."

Flynt, who gained noteriety during the Clinton Impeachment Trial, has already threatened to tarnish Milosevic's good name if he doesn't pull Serb troops out of Kosovo.

Milosevic is reportedly unmoved by the announcement that Flynt is entering the war. In an statement delivered over Serb television, Milosevic defiantly announced to the world, "The tactics that Clinton used against his political enemies will not work in Yugoslavia. Gurgle Boy, (Larry Flynt), poses no threat to me."



To: Les H who wrote (2572)4/7/1999 10:24:00 PM
From: D. Long  Respond to of 17770
 
<<25-30% is quite small for a guerrilla force in its home territory with 90% of the population represented by the ethnic group. I am no fan of either side. But the Rambouillet agreement IMO is just pushing off the inevitable further splintering of Kosovo under Yugoslavia into the future by pretending that Kosovo under the KLA will remain an "autonomous" province of Yugoslavia. Both the Serbs and Albanians within Kosovo deserve their autonomy.>>

Your assumption is that 30% of held ground is small for a guerilla force which is supported by that 90% ethnic majority. My argument has been, and continues to be, that they did in fact not enjoy such support. I have made that assertion in response to another post which made the absurd argument that the KLA is a popular muslim front. That 30% is tremendous considering their obvious failures and bungling only a year ago and the incredible odds they face in the midst of an occupied Kosovo. They had improved and were beginning to get the support of that 90% who were reacting to Serbian brutality. The bombing has nearly destroyed them. Maybe for the better...

As to both Serbs and Albanians within Kosovo deserving their autonomy, yes they do deserve to have a government which is responsive to the wishes of its constituency irregardless of ethnic make up. The fact that there is an insurgency movement is testemony to the fact that the Serbian dominated Kosovo is not responsive and indeed hostile. In such a hate filled, racist, nationalist region of the world, it is doubtful that anyone there could ever imagine a government "of laws, not of men." Or in the Balkan case, "of laws, not of ethnicities."