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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Chip Anderson who wrote (9407)	4/27/1999 10:39:00 AM
From: Stephanie M	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62550

Ways to Have an Extra-Specially Fun Time At WalMart! > >>>> > >>Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and > >>stranding them at strategic locations. > >>Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. > >Try on bras over top of your clothes. > >>Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms. > >>Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think > >>we've got a Code 3 in housewares," and see what happens. > >>Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and > >>turn the volumes to "10." > >>Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.(My personal fav) > >Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit. > >>Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles. > >> Put M&M's on layaway. > >Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. > >>Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only > >>invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath > >>Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray > >>air fresheners. > >>Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics. > >>When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why > >>won't you people just leave me alone?" > >>Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while > >>you pick your nose. > >>Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale > >>battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men. > >>Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon. > >>Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms. > >>Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission > >>Impossible." > >>Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store. > >>In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels. > >>Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say > >>things like "pick me!! pick me!!" and scare them into believing that > >>the clothes are talking to them. > >>When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal > >>position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!" > >Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out. > > Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If > >>the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't > >>get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it. > >>Go into the dressing room and yell real loud...Hey, were out of > >>toilet paper in here! > >> > >