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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Jay who wrote (9498)	5/5/1999 1:20:00 PM
From: Bob Bryenton	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

13 Signs That You Have Had Too Much of the 90's -------------------------------------------------- 1.) You tried to enter your password on the microwave. 2.) You now think of three espressos as "getting wasted." 3.) You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years. 4.) You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3. 5.) You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he e-mails you back "What's for dinner?" 6.) Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site. 7.) You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year. 8.) You didn't give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your e-mail buddies via a web page. 9.) Your daughter just bought a C.D. of all the records your college roommate used to play. 10.) You check the ingredients on a can of chicken noodle soup to see if it contains Echinacea. 11.) You check your blow dryer to see if it's Y2K compliant. 12.) Your grandmother clogs up your e-mail Inbox, asking you to send her JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver. 13.) You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone IS home. Bob

To: Jay who wrote (9498)	5/5/1999 10:58:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

A man with a nagging secret couldn't keep it any longer. In the confessional he admitted that for years he had been stealing building supplies from the lumberyard where he worked. "What did you take?" his priest asked. "Enough to build my own house and enough for my son's house. And houses for our two daughters and our cottage at the lake." "This is very serious," the priest said. "I shall have to think of a far-reaching penance. Have you ever done a retreat?" "No, Father, I haven't," the man replied. "But if you can get the plans, I can get the lumber."