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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (9839)	5/20/1999 10:04:00 AM
From: Barney	Respond to of 62549

Inconsiderate Mates ... One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle." While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence. The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra." This was beyond a silence response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. With a death grip in place she said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the gardener, the pool man and your brother."

To: Arthur Radley who wrote (9839)	5/20/1999 10:05:00 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

I Can Not Tell A Lie The Indian chief says to his son, "Son, you push-um outhouse off-um cliff?" His son says, "No, me no push-um outhouse off-um cliff." The chief says, "Son, me tell-um you story of Great White Father, George Washington. Many moons ago, when Great White Father was young boy, him chop-um down cherry tree. Him father ask-um, 'Georgie, you chop-um down cherry tree?' George say-um, 'Cannot tell-um lie, Father. Me chop-um down cherry tree.' Him father say, 'Georgie bad, but Georgie honest, so you no get-um punishment.' Now I ask-um you again... you push-um outhouse off-um cliff?" His son says, "Yes, Father, me push-um outhouse off-um cliff." The Chief proceeds to give-um big wuping to his son. The son says, "Father, Great White Father tell truth and get-um off scott-free. I tell-um truth... why you give-um me big wuping?" The Chief says, "Georgie's father not sit-um in cherry tree."