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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (10093)	6/2/1999 9:35:00 AM
From: BamaReb	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

Your Foxness, This is what happens when a moron has too much TBird before an 8 hour flight! trip.com

To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (10093)	6/5/1999 12:46:00 AM
From: Peter S. Maroulis	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

"Returning From Long Trip" A gentleman is returning home after a lengthy trip, and is met by his servant at the station. This is the onversation that they have on their way to his home. "So, has anything happened while I've been away?" "No, sir, I can't think of anything at all worth mentioning." "Come now, I've been away for weeks. Surely something must have happened in all that time." "Well, sir, come to think of it, your dog died." "My dog died? How awful! Still, he was getting on in years, and I suppose it had to happen some time. How did he die?" "The vet said it was probably from eating the rotten meat." "The rotten meat? Since when do we leave rotten meat lying around for the dog to eat?" "Well, it was the horses, sir. They'd been rotting for some time after the barn burned down." "Good heavens. How in the world did the barn burn down?" "It must have been some embers that blew over from the house, sir." "The house? The house burnt down, too? How did the house burn down?" "Well, sir, we think someone must have knocked over a candle." "Oh. ... Wait a moment - we don't use candles anymore to light the house! What were the candles doing there?" "They were there for the wake, sir." "The wake?!? Whose wake?" "Your mother's, sir. She passed away quite suddenly." "Oh my Lord. Mother is dead. The house is gone, along with the stable. Even my dog is dead. What did Mother die of?" "It must have been the shock, sir." "The shock." "Yes, sir, the shock. When your wife ran off with the handyman the day after you left, sir. But aside from all that, it's been fairly quiet while you've been away, sir."