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Pastimes
Malawi Unmoderated Vampire Thread
An SI Board Since January 2003
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Emcee:  Rick C. Type:  Unmoderated
VAMPIRE RUMORS CAUSE PANIC IN MALAWI

Wednesday, January 22, 2003


BLANTYRE, Malawi -- A radio journalist was arrested Sunday for interviewing a man who claimed he was attacked by vampires, under a Malawi government campaign to quash vampire rumors.

Maganizo Mazeze, who works for a community radio station in Blantyre, was charged with broadcasting false news that could lead to public unrest.

President Bakili Muluzi has ordered the arrest of anyone seen to be spreading accounts of vampires attacking villagers at night, which started circulating in this tiny east African nation in October.

Muluzi blames the stories on political opposition groups, who he says are trying to undermine him by saying his government gave aid agencies blood in exchange for food.

Since the rumors started, frightened villagers have beaten to death two men suspected of being vampires, attacked a ruling party official suspected of harboring vampires, attacked three visiting priests, and destroyed an aid group's encampment they feared was a vampire headquarters.

Mazeze's interview with a man from the southern tea-growing district of Thyolo was broadcast Saturday.

"As police, we are saying there is no evidence that we have blood suckers in this country," said police investigator Paul Chifisi. "No one has come forward with evidence, be it medical, physical or otherwise."

WELL NOW, doesn't this raise some serious issues?!

Like: Could this be a consequence from years of shipping expired pharmaceutical products to stupid people in Africa?

Like: Isn't this a serious threat to our Homeland Security here in the United States and to the Mississippi Delta Nutria population?

Like: Shouldn't we just bomb first? How much oil out there anyhow?

Like: Could Al Sharpton (...)? (fill in the blank)
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