YAHOO LURKERS (PART III) - ALL HEADLINES COLLECTED
Yes, some are missing. This is due to; a) somebody already did it, b) it was too lame, or c) I didn't see it, (sorry).
The first compilation, (the early years), can be found at:
Message 3256822
HEADLINES HEADLINES HEADLINES HEADLINES
MONICA FORGES AHEAD WITH ORAL TESTIMONY
(SURETHING)
GORE ONE BITE AWAY FROM PRESIDENCY
(LAURENS)
MONICA NOT SWALLOWING BILL'S STATEMENT
(JOHN. H)
SLICK TO DELIVER STAIN OF THE UNION DRESS
(DAVID DYCHE)
TEDDY: "WHAT'S ALL THIS FUSS ABOUT?"
(DAVID LAWRENCE)
STARR: "I'LL TAKE ANOTHER WHACK AT IT"
(JOHN H.)
PREZ SAYS DNA TESTING IS A SMEAR TACTIC
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
PREZ TO DISCUSS STATE OF THE UNIT ON TUESDAY
(TECH)
LORENA BOBITT APPOINTED SPECIAL PRESIDENTIAL ASSISTANT
(CODY ANDRE)
MONICA RESPONDS TO PROBE, ANSWER GARBLED
(PETE ROKER)
PROBE MAYRESULT IN HUNG JURY
(JAN MCCABE)
"OK , I'LL BITE" - MARV ALPERT
(JEFF NOLDER)
MONICA: "I SHOULD HAVE JUST KEPT MY MOUTH SHUT"
(DOUBLE D)
WILLY WINKS: "I AM NOT A WANKER!"
(JANICE SHELL, triple entendre with British slang award)
NEW REPUBLIC EDITORS CITE PRESIDENTIAL SELF-ABUSE
(MICHAEL SPHAR)
GORED BEAST CRIES: "COME FOR ME, I CAN'T STAND UP TO IT!"
(JANICE SHELL)
PREZ SEZ PROBE BLOWN ALL OUT OF PROPORTION, HOLDS FIRM, AWAITS FURTHER INPUT
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
PREZ PLANS TO END STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS WITH SENSATIONAL CLIMAX
(GEO. COYNE)
PRESIDENT'S DISCHARGE CAUSES PRESIDENT'S DISCHARGE
(SURETHING)
MONICA'S CREDULITY ATTACKED FOR LYING UNDER OAF
(SIG)
PRESIDENT PERSONALLY INTRODUCES INTERNS TO STAFF
(FRANK)
COMMANDER IN CHEEKS
(JAN MCCABE)
PRESIDENT ON INTERN: "SHE HAS SPUNK"
(DUNCAN IDAHO)
CLINTON; "I DIDN'T IMPALE"
(DAVID LAWRENCE)
MONICA: "I WAS JUST VACUUMING"
(DAVID LAWRENCE)
CHICK'S DICK TRICK SAYS MR. SLICK, NOBEL PICK'S MY SWIZZLE STICK
(PETE ROKER)
PROBE LANDS STAFF IN HOT WATER; SHORT HANDED, PREZ CALLS FOR TEMP RELIEF
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
POLL SUPPORT SOFTENS, HILLARY'S HANDLING NOT HELPING
(SURETHING)
PREZ TABLES MONICA ISSUE
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
IT'S ALL A MATTER OF SEMENTICS
(SURETHING)
MONICA: "GOVERNMENT SURPLUS OVERSTATED"
(DAVID LAWRENCE)
IF THERE IS NO SLIT YOU MUST ACQUIT
(HUNTER VANN)
THE WURST HAS YET TO COME
(DUNCAN IDAHO)
MONICA GRITS HER TEETH AND TESTIFIES, SLICK SAYS, "I FEEL YOUR PAIN"
(MICHAEL D. CUMMINGS)
IF I HEAR ONE MORE WORD ABOUT THE JUG EARED WEASEL AND HIS GIANT SUCKING SOUND, I WILL BARF ALL OVER YOUR SHOES
(JEFF NOLDER, not fully relevant, but extra amusing)
RABBI SAYS PROBE NOT KOSHER
(SURETHING)
PREZ BEGINS WHISTLE-STOP CAMPAIGN
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
STARR BETWEEN IRAQ AND A HARD PLACE
(HOLLY DEPENDAHL)
POLL IS UP AND HOLDING FIRM
(JAMES BOWERS)
PRESIDENT GAVE INTERN A PEARL NECKLACE
(SURETHING)
that's it for now, you Yahoo suckin' lurkers.
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