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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SofaSpud who wrote (11058)	8/13/1999 7:21:00 PM
From: Tomato	Respond to of 62549

> Abdicate--v., to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. > > Carcinoma--n., a valley in California, notable for its heavy smog. > > Esplanade--v., to attempt an explanation while drunk. > > Willy-nilly--adj., impotent. > > Flabbergasted--adj., appalled over how much weight you have > > gained. > > Negligent--adj., describes a condition in which you absentmindedly > > answer the door in your nightie. > > Lymph--v., to walk with a lisp. > > Gargoyle--n., an olive-flavored mouthwash. > > Bustard--n., a very rude Metrobus driver. > > Coffee--n., a person who is coughed upon. > > Flatulence--n., the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are > > run over by a steamroller. > > Balderdash--n., a rapidly receding hairline. > > Testicle--n., a humorous question on an exam. > > Semantics--n., pranks conducted by young men studying for the > > priesthood, including such things as gluing the pages of the > > priest's prayer book together just before vespers. > > Rectitude--n., the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a > > proctologist immediately before he examines you. > > Marionettes--n., residents of Washington who have been jerked > > around by Mayor Barry. > > Oyster--n., a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish > > expressions. > > Circumvent--n., the opening in the front of boxer shorts.