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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Mephisto who wrote (12773)	12/7/1999 10:24:00 PM
From: High Grader	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62558

It?s in The Blood Two vampires decide to go out for dinner, but have a certain amount of trouble choosing where to go. Tired of the local food in Transylvania, they both feel the need for something more exotic. After some discussion they settle on Italy because they have both heard that the food there is really good. So, off they go to Italy and end up in Venice. On a bridge over one of the canals, they hide in the shadows and wait for dinner. A few minutes later a young couple walks by. Making their move, the vampires each grab a person and, after sucking them dry, they toss the bodies into the canal below. The vampires find Italians extremely delicious and quickly opt for seconds. Another young couple approaches a few minutes later, only to suffer the same fate as the first, sucked dry and tossed into the canal below. Our vampires are now quite full but feel there is still room for dessert. In a short while, a third couple happens by to provide just that. As with the two previous couples, these people are sucked dry and tossed over the railing into the canal below. Our now satisfied vampires agree that they have had a meal to remember and start off the bridge to begin their way home. As they are about to change form and take to the air, they are stopped by the faint sound of singing. They are puzzled because they are alone on the bridge without a soul in sight on either side. After listening closely, they realise it is coming from the canal below. They look over the rail and see a big old alligator in the shallow water under the bridge, feasting on the bodies. As they listen, the alligator sings: Scroll down................ Here it comes................ You?re gonna love this................ ? Drained Wops keep fallin? on my head?.... Heh.. Heh

To: Mephisto who wrote (12773)	12/10/1999 1:12:00 PM
From: Tecinvestor	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 62558

Happy Baby Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. Two dozen babies are in the ward, 23 of which are crying and screaming. One, over in the corner, is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by and, to the gays' delight, she points out the happy child as theirs. "Isn't it wonderful?" Brad exclaims. "All these unhappy children, and ours is so happy." The nurse says, "He's happy now. But just wait until we take the pacifier out of his ass."