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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Nuni who wrote (13063)	1/17/2000 8:33:00 PM
From: Atticus	Respond to of 62549

A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to mate with their cows to increase their herd. The brunette takes their life savings of $600 dollars and goes to Texas to buy a bull. She eventually meets with an old cowboy that will sell her a bull. "It's the only one I got for $599, take it or leave it." She buys the bull and goes to the local telegram office and says, "I'd like to send a telegram to my friend in Louisiana that says: "Have found the stud bull for our ranch, bring the trailer." The man behind the counter tells her, "Telegrams to anywhere in the U.S. are $.75 per word." She thinks about it for a moment and decides. "I'd like to send one word, please." "And what word would that be?" inquires the man. "Comfortable." replies the brunette. The man asks, "I'm sorry miss, but how is your friend gonna understand this telegram?" The brunette replies, "My friend is blonde and reads REAL slow, when she gets this, she will see, COM-FOR-DA-BULL

To: Nuni who wrote (13063)	1/17/2000 9:04:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Glad you liked it! Here's another: SOUTH CAROLINA STATE PATROL Two Yankees are driving through South Carolina, when they get pulled over by a State Trooper. The Trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window and WHACK! ... The trooper smacked him right on top of the head with the stick. The driver finally comes to and asks, "What the hell was that for!?" The Trooper says, "You're in South Carolina, son. When we pull you over, you better have your license ready when we get to your car." Not wanting to make his situation with the law any worse, the driver says, "I'm sorry, officer, I'm not from around here." The Trooper runs a check on the guy's license, and he's clean. He gives the guy his license back and walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window. The passenger rolls his window down, and WHACK! The trooper smacks him with the nightstick also. After he recovers, the somewhat dazed passenger asks, "Holy smokes, Man!! ... What did you do that for?" The cop answers, "Just making your wishes come true." Still incredulous, the passenger follows up with, "Huh?" The Trooper says, "I know how you Yankees are! Two miles down the road you're gonna say, 'I wish that redneck bastard had tried that stuff with me!'"