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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: E who wrote (14163)	4/25/2000 12:50:00 PM
From: mr.mark	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

those were good ones, e

To: E who wrote (14163)	5/13/2000 4:12:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

COMPUTER TERMS FOR COUNTRY FOLK GOPHER : small animal that digs holes in yer lon HACKER : granpa after 62 years of smokin HANDSHAKING : granma with parkinsons HARDCODE : wen the snoot in yer nose gets real dry HARD COPY: pictur to look at when selecting tattoos HARD DRIVE : gettin home in the muddy season with a flat tire HARDWARE : (1) leather and spats (2) yer rifle and guns HEADER : a game as in the braves are playin a dubble header HOMEPAGE : place in the newspaper with houses for sale IBM : anser wen teechur calls yur name ICON : braggin as in icon lift yur truk with one arm INDEX : what poker cards cum in INFRARED : ware the leftovers go when Freds here INSTALL : ware ya keep your horse INTERACTIVE : run into the house INTERNET : (1) wut the bait duz wen ya catch it (2) ware cafeteria workers put thar hair INTERNET EXPLORER : a currous fish ITALIC : furriner from Roam JAVA : strong coffee JAVA APPLETS : fritters for dunkin JAZZ DRIVE ; fancy new sports car JOYSTICK : wat you open yur pants fur KEYBOARD : ware ya hang yur truk keys LAN : (1) to borrow as, Bert, lan me yur truk (2) the grass in fronta yur house LAPTOP : ware the little kids jump on to sit LASER PRINTER : fella too tired ta rite his ma LINK : breakfast sausage LOG ON : making a wood stove hotter LOG OFF : takin the wood off the pile fur usin MAC : yur kids favorite food MAIN FRAME : wut holds up the barn roof MANUAL : truk without automatic geers MEGABYTE : wucha git from Meg durin luvmakin MEGAHERTZ : (1) watcha git when yer not keerful gettin the farwood (2) yer head after 3 six-paks MEMORY : watcha dont furgit MEMORY CARD : used to cheat on tests MENU : restarent list MICROCHIP : wuts left in the munchie bag when the chips are gone MICROFICHE : tiny fish used fur bait MICROPROCESSOR : fine meat chopper fur making sausage MICROSOFT : defrostin a TV dinner in the microwave MICROSOFT WINDOWS : small plastic things on return envelopes MICROSOFT WORD : whisper MIME : belongs to me MODEM : whacha do to the grass twisa yeer MONITOR : teachur's helper at lunch MOTHERBOARD : source of toothpicks MOTOR HOUSING : a winnebago MOUSE : fuzzy white thing wut eats the horses grain in the barn and ya can stuff in your beer bottle to get a free case MOUSE PAD: where Mickey and Minnie live MULTICASTING : two actors taking turns playing a part in a play MULTISYNC : two washing areas in the same bathroom NETSCAPE NAVIGATOR ; leeder of fish eludin comershall fishermen NETWORK : (1) ESPN, FOX, NBC (2) scoopin up a big fish befor it breaks the line NEWSGROUP : wives gossippin NOVELL : (1) a fictional book (2) a new way of doin sumthing ONLINE: ware to stay when takin a sobriety test ORICLE : (1) earlobe (2) a singin bird OVERWRITE : what makes yur checks bounce PACKET : wucha do to a suitcase before a trip PASSWORD : fore, used wen playin golf PING : noise the truk makes wen ya use cheep gas PIXEL : small child or fairy PLOTTER PEN : jail for conspirators and terrorists PLUG-IN : push the end ot the TV cord into the wall POP : (1) Dad (2) coke or pepsi POP SERVER : Mom PORT : fancy wine PRINTER : fella who can't rite in handritin PRINTOUT ; wen ya uz a eraser or whiteout to currect a misteak PROGRAM : wuts on the TV when there's receptshun PROGRAMMER : fella with the TV remote PROMPT : wucha wish the mail was in mud season