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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Karen Lawrence who wrote (15615)	8/9/2000 2:37:11 AM
From: sandintoes	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 62549

Love that one, Karen! BEER TROUBLESHOOTING SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet. FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle. SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet. FAULT: Improper bladder control. SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless. FAULT: Glass empty. SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights. FAULT: You have fallen over backward. SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts. FAULT: You have fallen forward. SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet. FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face. SYMPTOM: Floor blurred. FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass. SYMPTOM: Floor moving. FAULT: You are being carried out. SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark. FAULT: Bar has closed. SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures. FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations. SYMPTOM: Everyone looks up to you and smiles. FAULT: You are dancing on the table. SYMPTOM: Beer is crystal-clear. FAULT: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up. SYMPTOM: Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear. FAULT: You have been in a fight. SYMPTOM: Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in. FAULT: You've wandered into the wrong party. SYMPTOM: Your singing sounds distorted. FAULT: The beer is too weak. SYMPTOM: Don't remember the words to the song. FAULT: Beer is just right.