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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Thomas M. who wrote (17621)	1/9/2001 11:45:52 AM
From: SteveJerseyShore	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

EVERAL CENTURIES AGO, THE POPE DECREED THAT > ALL THE JEWS HAD TO LEAVE ITALY, OR CONVERT. > THERE WAS, OF COURSE, A HUGE OUTCRY FROM THE > JEWISH COMMUNITY, SO THE POPE OFFERED A DEAL. > HE WOULD HAVE A RELIGIOUS DEBATE WITH A LEADER > OF THE JEWISH COMMUNITY. IF THE JEW WON THE > DEBATE, THE JEWS WOULD BE PERMITTED TO STAY IN > ITALY. IF THE POPE WON, THE JEWS WOULD HAVE TO > LEAVE. > > THE JEWISH COMMUNITY MET AND PICKED AN AGED > RABBI, MOISHE, TO REPRESENT THEM IN THE DEBATE. > RABBI MOISHE, HOWEVER, COULD NOT SPEAK LATIN, > AND THE POPE COULD NOT SPEAK YIDDISH. SO IT WAS > DECIDED THAT THEIRS WOULD BE A "SILENT" DEBATE. > > ON THE DAY OF THE GREAT DEBATE, THE POPE AND > RABBI MOISHE SAT OPPOSITE EACH OTHER FOR A FULL > MINUTE BEFORE THE POPE RAISED HIS HAND AND > SHOWED THREE FINGERS. RABBI MOISHE LOOKED > BACK AND RAISED ONE MIDDLE FINGER. > > NEXT, THE POPE WAVED HIS FINGER AROUND HIS HEAD. > RABBI MOISHE POINTED TO THE GROUND WHERE HE SAT. > > THE POPE THEN BROUGHT OUT A COMMUNION WAFER > AND CHALICE OF WINE RABBI MOISHE PULLED OUT AN > APPLE. > > WITH THAT, THE POPE STOOD UP AND SAID, "I CONCEDE > THE DEBATE. THIS MAN HAS BESTED ME. THE JEWS CAN > STAY." > > LATER, THE CARDINALS GATHERED AROUND THE POPE > ASKING HIM WHAT HAD HAPPENED.THE POPE SAID, > "FIRST I HELD UP THREE FINGERS TO REPRESENT > THE TRINITY. HE RESPONDED BY HOLDING UP ONE > FINGER TO REMIND ME THAT THERE WAS STILL ONE > GOD COMMON TO BOTH OUR RELIGIONS. THEN I WAVED > MY FINGER AROUND ME TO SHOW HIM THAT GOD WAS > ALL AROUND US. HE RESPONDED BY POINTING TO THE > GROUND TO SHOW THAT GOD WAS ALSO RIGHT HERE > WITH US. I PULLED OUT THE WINE AND THE WAFER TO > SHOW THAT GOD ABSOLVES US OF OUR SINS. HE > PULLED OUT AN APPLE TO REMIND ME OF ORIGINAL SIN. > > MEANWHILE, THE JEWISH COMMUNITY CROWDED > AROUND RABBI MOISHE. "WHAT HAPPENED?" > THEY ASKED. "WELL," SAID RABBI MOISHE, "FIRST HE > SAID TO ME, YOU JEWS HAVE THREE DAYS TO GET OUT > OF HERE!" SO I SAID TO HIM, "UP YOURS!" THEN HE > TELLS ME THE WHOLE CITY WOULD BE CLEARED OF > JEWS. SO I SAID TO HIM, "LISTEN HERE, MR. POPE, THE > JEWS WILL STAY RIGHT HERE! > > "AND THEN?" ASKED A WOMAN. "WHO KNOWS?" SAID > RABBI MOISHE. "HE TOOK OUT HIS LUNCH, SO I TOOK > OUT MINE."